If you’re a working mom who feels like she’s carrying everything—the schedules, the logistics, the reminding, the worrying, the fixing, the emotional temperature of the entire house—you’re not imagining it. In this episode of the UpLift Women’s Wellness Podcast, we sit down with Kathia Aviles, LMFT, business owner and mom of three, to talk about the real weight mothers hold and the unrealistic standards we’re all expected to meet.
This conversation fits right into our philosophy at Head to Toe Strength: supporting women with strength, nourishment, and coaching that actually honors their lived reality. If you’re new here, you can learn more about that on our Our Philosophy page.
The Invisible Load Nobody Sees — But Every Mom Feels
Kathia names the thing so many mothers feel but struggle to articulate: the never-ending mental list that runs your household. The planning, tracking, anticipating, packing, comforting, strategizing. The part that doesn’t show up on a calendar but takes more energy than any meeting ever could.
It’s a load carried disproportionately by moms across households, and that imbalance shapes how we move through work, parenting, and our own identity.
Parenting Pressure, Mom Shame, and (Yes) Dad Shame Too
She doesn’t sugarcoat it—moms feel judged constantly. Other moms. Social media. Schools. Society. Yourself.
And in a refreshing twist, she calls out something we often ignore: dads feel pressure too, especially inside “dad-only” spaces or activities where they’re expected to prove they’re involved enough.
This ties into something we emphasize inside our strength coaching programs: you cannot perform (in the gym or in life) when you’re stuck in comparison mode.
Whether it’s motherhood or movement—you are not a machine.
When You Lose Patience: Repair, Talk, Move Forward
Kathia gets honest about losing her temper and the guilt that follows.
Her strategy?
Acknowledge it
Apologize
Talk it through
And then let yourself move on
A repair doesn’t have to be dramatic. It just has to be real.
This mirrors the approach we take in our nutrition coaching and virtual training — progress comes from awareness and repair, not shame.
Work-Life Balance (Without Pretending It’s Easy)
As a therapist and business owner, Kathia built a career that lets her be present with her kids in the mornings before school. Her work fills her up, rather than drains her — which every mom deserves.
To stay connected to each of her children, she focuses on quality over quantity. Not hours of one-on-one time — just small, intentional connection.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re failing because you can’t do “more,” this part will feel freeing.
Self-Care that Actually Works for Moms
Forget the performative version of self-care. For Kathia, it looks like:
15–20 minutes alone behind a closed door
Time for her husband to pursue jiu-jitsu
Time for her own yoga practice
Mutual respect for each other’s needs
It’s simple, doable, and a reminder: you don’t need a full day away to reset (though that would be nice). Little pockets of solitude matter.
If you’re craving structure, accountability, or a way to build strength and routine that fits into the chaos of mom life, The Bethany Method™ was built for exactly this season.
Motherhood and Career: The Things That Shift
Becoming a mother changed Kathia’s professional trajectory. She postponed her PhD plans to prioritize presence. She redefined success around flexibility, groundedness, and sustainability.
This is exactly the kind of identity shift I see in so many of the women inside our performance coaching programs — not stepping back, but evolving.
Her Advice for Working Moms
Reject the “perfect mom” myth
Embrace good enough parenting
Trust that you’re capable, smart, and already doing more than enough
And if you need support in rebuilding routine, strength, or nourishment in a way that supports your life instead of taking more from it, explore:
Because you shouldn’t have to do all of this alone.
Advice for Companies Trying to Support Parents
Kathia’s recommendations are clear:
More flexibility
More generous sick leave
A compassionate culture
Less judgment
Remote work options whenever possible
Companies can absolutely do better — and when they do, parents thrive.
How COVID Shaped Her Therapy Business
COVID created two major openings:
A huge increase in need for mental health support
Social acceptance of telehealth
It gave her the ability to:
Serve more people
Control her schedule
Build her own therapeutic model
Her hardest early challenge: inconsistent income and needing to market herself. (A relatable moment for every small business owner.)
If you’re looking for therapy support that respects humanity and nuance, explore our Mental Health Therapy offerings with our team.
Want More Conversations Like This?
You can listen to all episodes of the show on our Podcast page, and explore topics across strength, nourishment, identity, and women’s wellbeing over on the Blog.
If this episode resonated, you may also love:
And of course, everything we create lives inside the Head to Toe Strength Shop.
SHOW NOTES
Being a working mom shouldn’t feel like carrying the whole world on your back — but most days, it does.
In this episode, we sit down with Kathia Aviles, LMFT, small business owner and mother of three, to talk about the invisible load moms carry and why so many women feel like they’re failing, even when they’re doing everything.
Kathia brings honesty, humor, and so much clarity to what it actually means to be a mom, a professional, and a whole human at the same time.
In This Episode, We Cover:
• The “Invisible Load”
The nonstop mental labor mothers hold — planning, remembering, organizing, anticipating — and why it creates such a huge gap between working moms and working dads.
• Mom Shame, Parenting Pressure & Even Dad Shame
How unrealistic expectations from society (and other parents) create pressure that no one can actually live up to.
• When You Lose Patience
Why guilt after snapping at your kids is normal, and how repair + conversation helps you actually move forward.
• Work-Life Balance That Isn’t Performative
Kathia opens up about redefining her career to build flexibility, presence, and sustainability into her routine.
• Connection With Your Kids
Why 15 intentional minutes matters more than hours of unfocused time together.
• Self-Care That Fits Into Real Life
No elaborate routines. No hidden rules. Just 15–20 minutes behind a closed door and mutual support with your partner.
• Career Shifts After Motherhood
How becoming a mom influenced Kathia's path as a therapist and business owner.
• Advice for Working Moms
Reject perfection. Embrace “good enough parenting.” Trust your instincts. You are capable and already doing enough.
• Advice for Companies
How workplaces can support parents better — flexibility, sick leave, and compassion.
• Starting a Therapy Business in the Middle of COVID
Why telehealth opened the door for her practice and what early challenges she had to navigate.
Who This Episode Is For
Working moms feeling stretched thin
Moms carrying the mental load for the entire household
Parents struggling with guilt or shame
Anyone trying to balance work, parenting, and personal identity
Women seeking support, connection, or a more grounded approach to their health
Mentions & Resources
If you’re exploring strength training, nutrition support, or a coaching approach that honors the full complexity of your life, you might also love:
Want more conversations like this? Browse all episodes on the UpLift Women’s Wellness Podcast page.
Work With Us
If you’re ready for strength, nourishment, and support that meets you where you are — not where you “should” be — schedule your free alignment call.
If You Loved This Episode
Please rate, review, and share it with another mom who needs to hear she’s not alone.
